I’m in one of my overwhelming – to the point of being crippling – 12th house hermit periods. I wish I could say I’ve been writing up a storm or at the very least reading a pile of novels, but my spare time has been utterly taken over by one action movie after another followed by a Veronica Mars marathon.
It doesn’t escape my attention that everything I’m watching so passively is the opposite of passive. It’s the ultimate vicarious thrill. My latest passion, Veronica Mars, even has Mars in the title!! I can’t tell if I’m sublimating physical activity or anger, (Mars behaviors) all I can say is it is incredibly satisfying to watch Veronica girl detective her way out of various scrapes surrounded by an awesome supporting male cast who put the support into supporting. No wonder this show has the rabid following it does, if it didn’t sound like too much effort and I weren’t so committed to lying prone in my girl cave for the duration I could probably muster up some foaming at the mouth action over it too.
I honestly cannot understand how this show escaped my attention before. I watched an episode out of sequence and didn’t get it, but it’s one of those you really have to watch from the beginning. Sigh. All those wasted years of not being on the inside. Had I known you can bet I would have pledged at least five dolla to their infamous Kickstarter campaign.
I just looked up Kristen Bell’s birth data, and apparently we don’t have the time of birth, but a.) I was heartened to realize she’s from Detroit (strengthening my theory about the connection between Detroiters and sisu) and amused to discover that b.) she was born with Mars at 4 degrees Libra, which any astrologer can tell you means she is about to go through a Mars return (Mars is about to transit Libra and when a planet returns to the same place it occupied when you were born it’s called a “return”).
This is amusing because the Veronica Mars movie will be released in March of next year and, since Mars is going to retrograde in Libra, her Mars return will still be active when Veronica Mars returns. Get it? See what I did there?
Well, not me, obviously, but isn’t the world wonderful and strange and full of pointless poignant connections? I just love a good astrological pun.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to get back to the show and find out why everyone was so pissed that it ended so abruptly. (I’m SO relieved I’ve only got a few months till it’s resolved instead of the years that most of the fans did!!)
Marilyn who watches from the wall
Today Venus is at 8 degrees Capricorn, coming up on a conjunction to Pluto and squaring Uranus at 9 degrees tomorrow. This is a week to be paying more than your normal attention to what makes the world go ’round, to put it mildly. (Hint: LOVE! It’s LOVE!! Love makes the world go ’round!!)
In Capricorn Venus is ruled by Saturn, which is not normally considered super awesome fun times. Saturn likes rules and discipline and order and Venus works best without conditions. As Rob Hand points out, you don’t want someone to tell you they’ll love you IF you do X or Y. We want love unconditionally no matter what. Which is why Venus in Capricorn or Aquarius or Venus making aspects to Saturn isn’t generally considered a fortunate placement. It’s not bad, exactly, but like all things Saturn related, it takes some effort to make it work.
However, that work can pay off in dividends, no joke. If the bad news about Venus and Saturn is that Venus needs discipline in order to work than the good news is that she can be disciplined. Very disciplined indeed.
In Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, Marilyn Monroe plays a girl who puts the gold into heart of gold by playing a gold digger named Lorelei. There’s a wonderful scene towards the end of the film where Lorelei is accused of heartlessness by her fiance’s father. It’s a classic scene, very funny, and the way Lorelei puts her future father-in-law in place perfectly illustrates an effective, if materially driven, Saturnine Venus. (Fun fact: Anita Loos, who wrote the book the film is based on was born with Venus in Taurus squared by Saturn in Leo.)
Mr. Esmond Sr.
Have you got the nerve to stand there and expect me to believe that you don’t want to marry my son for his money?
Mr. Esmond Sr.
Then what do you want to marry him for?
I want to marry him for your money!
So the first important takeaway from this dialogue relative to Venus with Saturn is that: a.) Saturn is dry. It can’t help itself, it makes things funny. This helps more than you would ever believe, because laughing over a broken heart is crucial to getting over one. But it doesn’t end there, because Lorelei gains Mr. Esmond Sr.’s respect by pointing out the essential hypocrisy in the way women are judged for marrying for money while men are not judged for marrying younger women.
Mr. Esmond Sr.
Well, at least we’re getting down to brass tax. You admit that all you’re after is money?
No, I don’t. Aren’t you funny? Don’t you know that a man being rich is like a girl being pretty? You might not marry a girl just because she’s pretty, but my goodness, doesn’t it help? And if you had a daughter, wouldn’t you rather she didn’t marry a poor man?
Mr. Esmond Sr.
You’d want her to have the most wonderful things in the world and to be very happy. So why is it wrong for me to want those things?
So here’s the second takeaway about Saturn and Venus: b.) Saturn has some very good points where Venus is concerned. A Saturnine Venus lives in the “real world,” the world where love and beauty have value as commodities, and we shouldn’t be afraid to use them as such but we must also never be in any illusion about what we’re doing or how far we can take it.
After all, a saturnine Venus knows that surface beauty doesn’t last (“men grow cold as girls grow old, and we all lose our charms in the end!”) and we need to capitalize on what we have while it’s still useful.
But a strong saturnine Venus runs much more than skin deep. An effective saturnine Venus knows just how much effort is required to put on our “girl suits,” as one dear friend with Venus in Aquarius puts it. We know we need to demand respect and recognition for our creations. We know exactly how deep true beauty runs and how far it will and won’t take us. We don’t take it for granted and we don’t over estimate our powers either. We know there’s more to putting on a “girl suit” than applying some lippie. It involves managing people’s egos, fears, concerns, and seating arrangements. Mostly without appearing to have done anything at all.
We know we need to value what we provide because if we don’t no one else will know they need to. So we tell them “to put a ring on it” if they want what we’ve got. Beyonce understands this. After all, she was born with Venus in Libra co-present with Saturn conjunct Jupiter.
If everything I’ve just described sounds to you like it “only applies to women” you’re missing something vital. While it’s true that women are either more natively attuned or socially conditioned to the powers of Venus, it’s not true that men don’t feel her affects or the need for them. James Brown, who penned the soulful It’s a Man’s World, was born with Venus in Taurus square to Saturn in Aquarius. He understood perfectly that his “man’s world” needed something of the feminine to it.
Bringing it into the current context, did you know that there is a rash of suicides amongst our beloved American heroes, the men who play pro-football? Brian Phillips hits the nail on the head when he analyzes this phenomena and asks the important question, “What the hell are you a warrior for?”
He is rightly demanding that as men his sex and gender take responsibility for the massive imbalance and tragedy that an overactive martial culture is spawning. He recognizes that without some sense of unity, of love for one another, that any pretense of “being a man” is just that. Pretense.
So, to sum up, the true value of Venus in Capricorn is that she knows her true value and that value isn’t limited to financial equity. At her best, a saturnine Venus demands R E S P E C T for her worth because she knows she deserves it. (And why yes, as the fates would have it, Aretha Franklin does have Venus and Saturn contacts. Not only are they square but they are in mutual reception!)
So the take away this week is it is time to either demand or give some respect in some area of your life where it may be lacking. Don’t be ashamed or shy about it either. Let love in, release it and honor everything that it takes to do so. Don’t let anyone dismiss it or tell you you’re imagining things, being too sensitive, or not sensitive enough.
Sometimes Venus is a diva. Sometimes she has to be.
Bella in the forest
I watched the final movie in the Twilight saga the other night. DON’T JUDGE ME! No, it’s ok, you can judge me, I know how everyone feels about it. It’s not like I can’t see how awful it all is and why it’s so upsetting (though frankly I don’t think the films get enough credit for how entertaining they are in their badness) but I really do enjoy the storyline, and even worse (apparently) I actually like Bella.
I’ve discovered this is an incredibly unpopular position to take, but it’s not the first time I’ve been fascinated by a woman that is universally hated. It’s actually why I read the books in the first place. Everyone was talking about it so I picked the first book up just to to see why everyone was so furious with her. I kept waiting for the shoe to drop and to find myself hating her too, but it never happened. In fact, with every page I turned I liked Bella more.
She’s described as narcissistic, but a lot of people her age are, I certainly was. I’m inclined to cut her some slack for that. She’s also described as weak and without personality, but that I can’t see. I understand why people do, of course. After all, Bella loves a man who is either stalking her or rejecting and cold. She identifies herself through the experience of loving him so profoundly that she cannot imagine living without him. Literally, she actually attempts to kill herself when he leaves her.
Don’t mistake me, I understand perfectly why this is a dangerous story to instill in a generation of girlish hearts. After all, while those girls are indoctrinating themselves in the myth of sacrificing everything for True Love their boyish peers are learning about girls and how to treat them from internet porn. We’re raising our girls to sacrifice themselves for boys who are being raised to think of girls as play toys. Yeah, it’s a perfect storm. No mistake about it.
Besides, the greatest supernatural twist of the story is that two people who hate themselves somehow manage to fall in love with one another. That’s the most unrealistic thing about it, if you ask me. That NEVER works in real life. I should know, I’ve tried enough times.
Bella’s chance to glitter
But none of that seems to tarnish the shiny bright thing I like about the story. Like legions of young girls (and their mamas!) I’m drawn to the story not because of Bella’s many sacrifices, but because of her victories. I don’t see Bella as weak, because Bella knows what she wants. She is single-minded in the pursuit of it, and Bella wins her quest. She gets her guy and soothes the savage beast. Love is revealed as transformative, and more importantly, redemptive. Through her love Edward is relieved of his self-loathing and anger and released into a profound sense of purpose. Through his love for her Bella learns to love herself, she becomes confident and strong. She becomes resplendent.
Twilight is obviously a modern reworking of Beauty and the Beast and I don’t think you can seriously look at this story and its popularity without asking yourself why we need to tell this tale and why we need to tell it now. I think it’s because Beauty (Venus) really does have the power to soothe what is savage and torn (Mars). Venus heals, reveals, honors, and raises up. Venus reconciles, she unifies. She takes what is broken and she makes it whole. She shields us from pain and gives us something to fight for (Mars again). We would be lost without her.
But in our modern world, those qualities are not celebrated or honored. Instead we equate them liberally with womanhood and mothering. We hold them in contempt and push them into the corner only to be brought out as prizes to be offered up to action heroes and villains alike. We don’t protect Venus, we don’t fight for her. We abuse her, we ridicule her, we tell her we’ll only like her if she wears make-up – but not too much! If she wears too much we call her a slut.
And it’s not like Mars has it so great. Mars is equated primarily with revenge, war and killing. From Rambo to the most recent Die Hard movie we’ve staked our claim on how Mars is supposed to behave and look like. The functions of Mars, to sever and separate, and to act on what is desired, have been perverted into increasingly grotesque caricatures. We demand that our men be warriors first, and we don’t even really care what they’re fighting for, just so long as they fight. Our modern day Mars truly is a beast.
all that glitters
Is it any wonder then that Bella is the spokesperson for Venus in our time? The true horror of Twilight doesn’t have anything to do with vampires or werewolves. The horror is that we live in a time where our experience of beauty (Venus) is so narrowly defined that we need to freeze a woman at 18 in order for her to be pretty. The true horror of Twilight is that the love story (Venus) that defines this generation can only be told by a woman who hates herself and loves someone who hates himself too. The true horror of Twilight is that love can only be redemptive, not reflexive and that it takes a woman with supernatural strength to experience or express it.
The true horror of Venus is that in this day and age it takes a horror story to tell her story.
Demon Will gives good side-eye
Today’s post is brought to you by, you guessed it, The Good Wife. What did you think was going to happen? It’s Monday!! It aired last night! So, despite the fact that pretty much no one read my last post about it I’m going to write another one! That’s what a Pluto transit will do to you, (it’s transiting my Sun right now) it renders you obsessive and self serving.
Speaking of which, can we talk about what an enormously entertaining A-hole Will Gardner has become??! SO awesome. So hot. So glad I don’t know anyone like him in real life. Here he is above giving Diane the side-eye after she had the temerity to tell him not to let Alicia “get in his head.”
His response? ”No. (BEAT) That’s exactly where I want her.”
For realz, guys. This guy is the POSTER child for Venus/Pluto dramarama. I love how unrepentant he is, how full of life and zest and joy. The intense Revenge Flirting with Alicia he enjoyed when she called a disciplinary hearing against him isn’t nearly enough to satisfy his insatiable lust. So naturally he’s picked up some random CRAZY girl in a bar (oh man, I can’t wait for THAT time bomb to go off!) and he’s having totally hot sex with her ALL THE TIME. In FRONT of people. He’s shameless, basically just riding one wave after another of Revenge, Lust and Greed. He’s totally enjoying this transit of Pluto to his Venus. Dirty bird.
He should be more careful. A Pluto transit is something to treat with respect, there’s a reason it elicits warnings from astrologers. Not everyone enjoys the experience. For instance, the mastermind behind Girls Gone Wild, and that poor idiot girl who dressed as a Boston Bomber victim for Halloween both have Venus in Aries getting hit by a conjunction to Uranus squaring Pluto. To be fair, it’s probably the Uranus hitting their Aries Venuses that is causing the worst of the trauma. Aries demands independence and autonomy anyways, it’s not an easy placement for Venus, which craves connection and unity. With Uranus there, the planet that demands freedom at all costs, and Pluto squaring Uranus (a square indicates conflict with external circumstances) it’s pretty much a recipe for some profound earth shaking.
Will’s Power Pose
Fortunately for my Sunday nights I don’t think Will is going to be more careful. I think he’s going to be exactly NOT careful. He’s been sitting on this animosity and aggression for a very long time, playing nice, being honorable, doing the right things. And now he’s feeling vindicated, he’s feeling like he doesn’t have to behave anymore, as if in betraying him, Alicia gave him permission to be as evil as he’s always wanted to be.
Turns out that’s pretty evil. But with Pluto in Capricorn on his side (Darth Vadar anyone?) he might – just might – come out ahead. Of course, it would be a mistake to count Alicia out. That one is sly, deep, and complicated. Smart and resourceful, sure, but more than that, she’s emotional. She’s passionate and intense and frankly a little bit nuts. She almost always zigs when you think she’s going to zag. I smell Scorpio. She’s more than a match for Will, which is exactly why he’s having so much fun. Venus and Pluto combinations need a fight to really get excited. It’s as if the fight is foreplay for them. I predict that the cliffhanger at the end of this season will include those two having some seriously upsetting Revenge Sex.
Will it result in Will assuming the universal pose of victory, as he did at the close of last night’s episode? Who knows? That’s for laters. Right now it’s Alicia: One, Will: One. The ball is in your court, Alicia…
OMG did you guys watch The Good Wife last night? My heart! People in suits have never been this interesting! The show went from being a good show to a profoundly great show in a single hour.
And the whole time I was watching it all I could think was how much money I’d be willing to bet that Will’s Venus is at ten degrees Capricorn. Yeah, yeah, he’s fictional, whatever. So one of the writers has a Venus at ten degrees Cap. The whole hour was basically a televised Greek drama depicting the current Uranus/Pluto square. Uranus wants freedom at all costs and Pluto wants power and control.
Astrologers have been looking to this square for a couple years now, since it has been seen as a harbinger of a particular sort of upheaval and strife politically and culturally. To put it in perspective, the last time we had a hard contact between the two planets was in the sixties and before that during the Depression. Revolution, people, that’s what it’s all about. This time around the concern is that Uranus and Pluto are in cardinal signs and Pluto, in particular, is in Capricorn, which values tradition, rules for rules sake, and stern authority. You can probably see how astrologers are quick to attribute our current polarized political climate on these two heavenly bodies.
And there’s been a slew of politically themed tv dramas coming out lately, from House of Cards to Scandal that amp up the general distrust of political figures (Uranus in Aries) whilst simultaneously glamorizing them (Pluto in Capricorn). Scintillating stuff.
But for my money the juice is in the personal. If you’ve got these planets hitting your own chart hard right now than watching The Good Wife may be a pretty good remedial measure for you. Hate your boss? Your partner? Your co-workers? Feeling a revolution burning inside you? Let The Good Wife live it out for you, seriously, the fall out on that show this season is going to be phenomenal. RIVETING. Great for television, lousy for your life. Let these characters take the hit for you, they’re about to makes themselves utterly miserable.
Everyone was awesome and I have a feeling I’ll be talking about it more as we go, but last night was Will’s night. Up till now he’s been so sympathetic and great, really understanding and such a good guy. But last night he got betrayed but good. And worse, it wasn’t the first time it’s happened to him recently. When Diane betrayed him a couple episodes ago he showed his teeth for the first time, but last night was the real game changer.
The show in general has a really Plutonic feel to it, but last nights show was all Pluto all the time, and Will and his relationships with women (Venus) was the locus for most of it. I said before that his character had Venus at ten degrees Capricorn, but only because that’s where Pluto is right now. Of course when I looked up Josh Charles’ birthday (the actor who plays Will) it turns out that he’s got Venus conjunct Pluto natally, so he was pretty much born to play this guy. At the end of last nights episode when Will says he’s going to win, and he’s going to take them all down, I believed him. This is going to be a fight to the death in true plutonic fashion.
Get your popcorn and strap yourselves in, my little Milk Duds, it’s gonna be a bumpy season.
I was actually looking for a different Buffy the Musical tune to illustrate this post. The one where the Scooby gang is searching for Buffy and Willow sings her only line in the show, “this line’s mostly filler,” because that’s all I’ve got in me today. Filler. But that one didn’t come up, instead this much darker one with Sarah Michelle Geller singing about why she wishes her friends hadn’t magicked her back from the dead. Some serious Capricorn dramarama going on here. Seriously, what other sign prioritizes duty as the most important reason to live? Bunch of sad sacks, really. But the last lines from Spike always make me tear up anyway. If you’ve got nothing else, then duty is a pretty good bet, there’s always plenty of it to go around. Anyway, Buffy’s probably my favorite Capricorn, and here is SMG putting the smolder into depression.
Let’s talk about Audrey Fleurot, you guys. My sexy French girlfriend. Let’s DEFINITELY not talk about how dirty my laptop screen is. Eeeuw. I didn’t even notice that, I was so busy congratulating myself for picking an angle where you couldn’t see how filthy my kitchen is right now. (That stuff about Capricorns being dirty birds? All true.)
Sorry, Audrey, not to take away from your outrageous gloriousness, but you know it’s so. After all, you’re a Capricorn too! I’m not going to start writing a Hot Slut of the Day column like my hero, Michael K, but if I were going to, damn it if Audrey wouldn’t be a great way to start.
I might have to start a tag for Hey Baby, What’s your sign? though. Because that’s how I figured out that my future wife Audrey was a Capricorn. I was deep in the middle of one of the best tv marathons I’ve had this year watching Engrenages on Netflix streaming. It’s Spiral for us English speakers, but I amused myself for four seasons and one week trying to say Engrenages in a full throaty voice with the announcer during the opening credits.
This, of course, made me think of my high school French teacher, who, it was rumored, liked to visit nude beaches when she went to France with her family. So for every naughty thought I had about Ms. Fleurot, I kept hearing Madame C intoning “Yvette!” in a scandalized voice. The trouble with memory is that it has a terrible habit of ambushing you out of turn.
Anyway, Audrey plays a conniving, manipulative defense attorney named Josephine Karlsson. She’s cold as ice, except when she’s had a few drinks, she’s always impeccably dressed, she has a stare that could nail you to the wall from fifty yards off and she’s got serious daddy issues. Of course I pegged her character for a Capricorn, but the actress was soooo convincing I had to look her up. Turns out she was born on January 1st, The Day of the Emotional Organizer, (barf) just like me!!! Move over JD Salinger! I’ve got a new New Years Birthday mate!!
I can’t tell you how thrilling this is for me. Yes, J Edgar Hoover shares our birthday, but with Audrey by my side I feel quite up to the challenge of repressing his ghost in favor of good tailoring, minimal accessories, and a steely gaze that masks a thousand sorrows. Wait, that last bit doesn’t sound fun at all. Scratch that, let’s just go for tailoring, simple accessories, and loosening up with a stiff drink. We can work out the details later.
On the eponymous TV show, Dexter, a serial killer goes into NA to placate his girlfriend who mistakenly believes he’s a heroin addict. Although Dexter’s there under false pretenses, he begins to fall under the sway of the twelve step program and under their watchful guidance he begins to accept who he really is. I’m only through the middle of the second season so I don’t yet know if that works in his favor at the end of the day, but watching it last night at 1:30 in the morning after promising myself all day I would be in bed by 10:00, I found myself wondering if I shouldn’t try a twelve step program myself.
Hello, my name is Wonder, and I’m a TV junkie.
I listened to an MP3 lecture Michael Lutin gave at UAC recently about “The Power of the Sun,” in which he said that the thing you must do when you lose energy is that thing your sun tells you to do as indicated by sign and house position. Which struck me, ’cause it occurs to me that people with 12th house suns like mine need to lose energy in order to gain it. Basically the whole nature of addiction is all bound up in somehow escaping yourself, which is totally a 12th house need. And Neptune, natch, but let’s stick with the 12th house, ’cause it so neatly aligns with my 12 step metaphor.
Anyway, it occurs to me that once again I’m tempted to blame a problem on my chart, but since the first step to recovery is to admit you have a problem, I can’t do that. I repeat: my name is Wonder, and I’m a TV junkie. This blog is my methadone, my meeting, and the splenda in my decaf. It’s my escape from my escape.
I’m still getting anxious texts and Facebook messages from people asking me about the “new zodiac” and whether they’re still an Aquarian, or gulp, God forbid, a Capricorn. Clearly this is a veeerrry urgent concern, so this post is for all of my little radishes out there who do not want to be any other sign than the sign they thought they were!
In short: fear not, Little Radishes! You are still Radishes! Or Aquarians, or whatever it was you were before this “new discovery.” In fact, neither the Precession of the Equinox (which incidentally is the phenomena responsible for the idea of the Age of Aquarius) nor the constellation Ophiuchus are new discoveries, least of all to astrologers. Knowledge of both dates back over two thousand years ago to a time when the terms astrology and astronomy were synonymous, so the fact is, the discoveries were very likely made by someone who also practiced divination. Neither of them affects our craft because our craft is actually not (despite widespread popular belief) based on the constellations.
I can understand that this sounds absurd when it’s common astrological lore to talk about the double-faced Gemini “twins,” and the unforgiving sting of the Scorpio “scorpion.” Never the less, it’s true. Western astrology is based on the relationship of the earth to the sun and moon, or the seasons, not on the relationship of the earth to the constellations. In other words, 0 degree Aries is the beginning of the western zodiac and it always coincides with the spring equinox, NOT 0 degree Aries the constellation. It’s been this way since Ptolemy in 200 AD, and although no one knows exactly why the ancient Greeks decided to abandon a sidereal zodiac (based on constellations) for the tropical (based on seasons) they did, and it fits in nicely with the Greek obsession for the ideal, the perfect. The western zodiac is simply the circle divided into 12 equal portions all balancing each other out – it’s very yin and yang, and the Greeks conceived it as a perfect representation of a perfect, ordered world.
Hence a sign is simply a 30 degree division of a 360 degree circle, with no relation to a constellation. Therefore the proposal of a “13th sign” is irrelevant. Since the signs are not based on constellations, the fact that there are more than 12 constellations has no bearing on anything.
However, modern astronomers are naturally prone to error in their assumptions about astrology, and periodically they like to pose both these astronomical facts as “proof” that astrologers are ignorant of the astronomy behind their craft and hence that astrology is bunk. This time, for whatever reason, the internets caught hold of the canard and the whole thing went viral.
For more information on zodiac symbols and why astrologers continue to use them to describe signs, stay tuned to this space – I’m working on another article to explain this further!
For more about the 13th constellation and how that isn’t the same thing as the 13th sign please check these articles:
I have been feeling all manner of Apocalyptic lately.
But I remind myself that with Pluto transiting my Venus right now and Saturn approaching my Moon, it’s only natural that I should be feeling so full of death and fear of destruction. Which brings me to my point: although you can’t blame astrology for any impending apocalypse if you hate your life for any reason, chances are you can blame astrology for it! After all, astrology is very simply a measurement of time and how it affects us, so it always serves as a useful reminder that everything, good and bad, shall pass. Except your human nature, and astrology can help you there too, by describing your human nature and telling you to just deal with it. Sometimes, in some ways, you just suck. It’s OK. The only thing worse than sucking at being human is pretending you don’t suck at being human. Stop fighting yourself.
It’s like how I used to be seriously uptight. All. The. Time. And then I started getting stoned, which made me really super paranoid, but then I could just tell myself, “hey, Wonder, relax, you’re just stoned!” and then later when I was sober and started to feel paranoid, I found myself telling myself, “hey, Wonder, relax, you’re just uptight and paranoid!” Saved my life. Now when I’m freaking out about this or that I just check my transits and tell myself, “Dude, relax, it’s just Mars rocking your Descendant! It’ll pass!”
Obviously, this isn’t going to work for everybody. Some people prefer Jesus, or Buddha, or a nice warm gun. But I take the long range view. The planets have been here awhile – since way before Jesus or Buddha – and they’ll probably be here a lot longer than any of us here now. They’re real, they’re visible, and they couldn’t care less about my death wish or whether I’ve gained a few pounds. Very comforting, that. Especially that last part. Excuse me while I go check my transits to see if I can blame astrology when I go visit Yogurtland for the sixth time in four days…